VAMPIRE RACEHORSE by Erica Loberg

When I think about a
24-hour day
I know I am going to have ongoing
obsessional thoughts
coupled with
observations that constantly spring forth
in my mind
all throughout
the daylight.

Itā€™s like youā€™re having a conversation with yourself
when you’re by yourself.

My mind only gets a temporary break
when I engage in a conversation
with a human being.

An exchange with a cashier at CVS
a tiny conversation with a random person on the elevator
a brief encounter with the lady that has a locker beside me at the gym.

It is the only time
my shooting thoughts
can rest
because any human contact
of verbal exchange
settles my mind
and distracts itself
from itself.

Then nightfall hits
and I am left alone
in my bed
where my mind is a racehorse
worse than the daytime before.

Am I a vampire
that only comes alive at night
horsing around in my head?

So, where does that leave me?

Iā€™m thrown to the werewolves,
of insomnia.
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Mad in America hosts blogs by a diverse group of writers. These posts are designed to serve as a public forum for a discussionā€”broadly speakingā€”of psychiatry and its treatments. The opinions expressed are the writers’ own.

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